The Lighthouse: Liveblog

Back Again! It's great when you miss episodes cause then you don't have to wait long for new ones. And duh, spoilers. Here we go:

previously, on Lost: lots of stuff. It's kinda making me feel like the last three episodes were pointless and Ithat nothing at all happened. Good times.

AND computer freeze. Sigh.Well that is a nice photo of Jack and Dad. Also Jack, whatever happened to your neck? Oh, you have another scar? Or wound? Can't be good. Apendicitis? Didn't that happpen on the island? Juliet did it? It was a weird plot twist that I didn't much care for? Yeah, think so.

Damn Jack you look good. But who the fuck is David? Your son? OMG JACK IF YOURE MARRIED TO JULIET IMMA BE PISSED>


"Is leaving an option?" Stupid Jack. Um, awesome forest tic-tac-tow game. LOVE Miles and Hurley. LOVE them.OH he Jacob.Like so much.

Wow that was an intensely informative teaser.

Hey David. Sup. You look like Jack with long hair. Also you're moping like jack mopes. AND HES STILL A SOX FAN. So at least we know it isnt bizarro land. Yay Alice in Wonderland reference!!! Ouch, David is amn ass.J

Ooo sayid. Are you evil yet??

EWWWWWW Jin's foot. Ewwwwwwwww gross. Claire looks like a pineer. um still ew. still really ew.STILL EW. Jin, gross.

Hurley, you would write on your arm. So while he's looking, who do you think is coming to the island? Who is not there? Also I love new Hurley. SO MUCH. Anyone speak Japanese? Jacob apparently.

Aw Jacob are you going to tell jack that he has to save someone?
Or his dad? Or Claire? AWWW. you have what it takes? That's precious, probably. It's jack-childhood time, I think.

Owie Jin. owie owie owie. AND EW. Lost stop with the blood, please. Um, wow, Claire is CRAZY. Wow. fake- baby? shit shit shit. WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD.

Um, how is that guy not dead? was he not shot in the head? Claire don't manhandle justin! Wow you really are Rousseau. Interesting fact: Claire is also a french name. What's her last name in lost-land? Aw, Hurley is going to be sad.

Wow diss by kate-- JAck is rejected. Also, Jack, lesson number one: you live on a magic island. Lesson number two: when living on said magic island, follow the directions of mysterious invisible men. Usually. Lesson number three: ignore Kate.

Ohh will time!!!! Guess: Jack gets nothing. Claire gets everything. CORRECT! HOPE FOR THE WIN. +100 LOST points.

Justin I'm not liking you. EW EW GROSS CLOSEUP ON THE WOUND. EWEW AGAIN. Poor hurt Jin. So who's the friend? Man in Black? Claire please don't disembowel Justin.

Ew look at all the bugs in the shot with Hurley and jack. Ick. Jack stop having daddy issues. WOW an inhalor. Shannons? OH THE CAVES. EW DEAD BODIES. SDon't be so nonchalant about them, Hurley. Also your time travel theories are confusing, but wrong. OH RIGHT you saw Dr. Shepard. Aka... what? Who is it now? Jack your daddy issues are kinda boring. Let's go back to Claire.

So pause: Locke is clearly different from Shepard and Claire because his body is still around whereas the other two's bodies are missing. Hm, so what gives?

So, question: who's the mother? Aw Jack are you a good dad? That would be sweet. HAH Hurley. Old school: traipsing through the jungle, on our way to do something we don't understand, good times. AKA my favorite line thus far.

Hurley why're you wearing a red shirt? Dislike. Just a side note as Jack is about to give some stupid speech about how much he hates the island. OOO new statue!!! ... Or a lighthouse. Good question Jack. So the lighthouse is the room of requirement?

Um Jin? You going to say something? Ohhhh branded, huh? Uh oh. UH OH. Jin? Jin, you're not explaining this well. Can you say how Kate found him abandoned and couldn't find you? No? Not going to happen? ... K.

UM EW LOST WHY THE BLOOD AND THE CHOPPING?!?!

Dude Jack that was awesome. You should kick down doors more, it suits you.Also if you fuck this up for your son, seriously, it just means Cuse and Lindleson hate you fo realz. Little boy I find you CREEPY AND ITS THE WEIRD JAPANESE GU. THE PONYTAIL IS A DEAD GIVEAWAY. WEIRD WEIRD WEIRD.

Dude this set is awesome. Also the names are weird. And the mirror is weird. This is a little overwrought, no? Whole whole reflection thing? Very disney. Also very harry potter, whats the name of that mirror? yeah, harry potter. Jack, it's just a magic figure, I don't know how he knows things but he does. Um, k, Jack is STUPID. But then I think Jacob must have known he was going to do that, unless he's stupid too. Which of course is a possibility. and with that bit, I think we've seen all there is in the original trailer for the season. Nice.

Jack don't yell at your son, please. Or guilt-trip him. Your son will do that enough for you without your help. This is mildylcute, though. Shepard-love and all. Jack, you don't suck as a dad, look! and you're a hot dad... cause that's relevent to this scene, I promise...

Aw Hurley you have pen on your face. JINX JACOB JINX! THAT WAS AWESOME. +10000 POINTS!!!! Awesome. Awesome. Jacob, you couldn't have told Locke how important he was? I think that II like the man in black better....

HEY LOCKE WHATS UP!!! You're the friend. DUHZVILLE.

Hm, this episode. So, I actually kind of liked it. A lot of it was obvious, but I liked it! I don't know, I guess it was nothing more than an entertaining hour of TV. I don't feel particularly bad or good about it. And I guess "meh" isn't that good. But I love Hurley. Also, Lost, please actually USE Miles instead of just having him be asian Hurley. But then, rereading what I wrote, I disliked parts-- the lighthouse itself, the magic mirror, jack's self absorbtion and silly rants... hmm. Maybe it was crummy afterall. Not, but still. I can't defend it as being good, but it was was inoffensive. Come on, Claire was awesome.